Archive for January, 2006

Five things I had to keep explaining to the guy at REI

Monday, January 23rd, 2006
  1. I’ll mostly be seated and typing while I wear these shoes
  2. I very rarely leave the house
  3. There’s a paucity of rocks to climb in the Sunset District
  4. I’d prefer shoes that don’t look like “The Visible Man”
  5. These have more than enough “torsion control” for smoking cigars and walking to the Walgreens

Five places I’ve had my hair cut

Monday, January 23rd, 2006
  1. The Head Shop - Cincinnati, OH; 1976
  2. Hair Vegas - Port Richey, FL; 1982
  3. Hair on Earth - Tallahassee, FL; 1996
  4. The Grateful Head - San Francisco, CA; 2002
  5. Every Six Weeks - San Francisco, CA; 2005

Five good things to absorb while you’re still young

Monday, January 23rd, 2006
  1. a lot of hippies are selfish, unpleasant, and not particularly funny
  2. people who argue well aren’t necessarily right
  3. cars are kind of a weird thing to spend a lot of money on
  4. people will do things for you if you ask them as a favor
  5. angry waiters totally do things to your food

Five reasons the terrorists hate us (apart from “our freedom”)

Monday, January 23rd, 2006
  1. Wal-Mart’s everyday low prices
  2. those accursed speakers of truth at Fox News
  3. the bodacious racks of our many former child stars
  4. those delicious steak fries
  5. Bladder Buster Thursdays at that one place near campus

Five decidedly un-super supergroups

Monday, January 23rd, 2006
  1. GTR
  2. Mike & the Mechanics
  3. Damn Yankees
  4. USA for Africa
  5. Power Station

Five things you can bring along to help make the party all about you

Wednesday, January 11th, 2006
  1. your doggie
  2. your 12-string
  3. your new Nikon
  4. your puppet friend
  5. Dianetics

Five people I’d love to observe trying to have dinner together

Wednesday, January 11th, 2006
  1. Jerry Lewis
  2. Burt Bacharach
  3. Bill O’Reilly
  4. Rickey Henderson
  5. Little Richard

Five more excellent public radio names

Wednesday, January 11th, 2006
  1. Ofeibea Quist-Arcton
  2. Nguyen Qui Duc
  3. Sylvia Poggioli
  4. Hermione Gee
  5. Carol Anne Clark-Kelly (four first names!)

Five works I adore by artists I otherwise don’t care for

Wednesday, January 11th, 2006
  1. Madonna - Borderline
  2. Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here
  3. Counting Crows - Angels of the Silences
  4. Michael Jackson - Off the Wall
  5. Kelly Clarkson - Since U Been Gone

Five people I’m told I impersonate badly

Wednesday, January 11th, 2006
  1. Roger Whittaker
  2. Bobby McFerrin
  3. Arnold Schwarzenegger
  4. my friend, Thomas
  5. Ray Milland

Five things it’s worth paying a little extra for

Wednesday, January 11th, 2006
  1. call brand gin
  2. AAA Plus
  3. the large sake
  4. the upgrade on Alaska Airlines
  5. room service coffee