Five nice perks of becoming an OT-VII

1. warranty automatically extended 90 days on all E-metersā„¢
2. tone level over 20 entitles you to free iced tea refills at the Celebrity CentreĀ©
3. Xenu personally emails your kid on her birthday
4. complimentary _Look Who’s Talking_ tote bag, _Risky Business_ satin jacket
5. double card stamps toward your next “‘Ron the Commodore’ 12-inch Hoagie” for each celebrity “girlfriend” you can contribute

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