Five good responses for telemarketers or collection agencies

  1. I’m sorry, but what does this have to do with human sacrifice?
  2. Seriously, will you still be this interested in me after we’ve dated for a while?
  3. Would you be able to tell if I were defecating right now?
  4. I am French. Your money means nothing to me.
  5. I can smell your panties through the phone.
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