October 21st, 2007
- Sexy Prius
- Sexy Ahmadinejad
- Sexy Oncologist
- Sexy Alexander Pope
- Sexy Scented Candle
October 18th, 2007
- “A Good Man is Hard to Find,” by Flannery O’Connor
- Les Chants de Maldoror by Comte de Lautréamont
- “The Call of Cthulhu” by H. P. Lovecraft
- À rebours by J.K. Huysmans
- Goodnight Moon, by Margaret Wise Brown
October 9th, 2007
- Syphilitic Spice
- Phlegmatic Spice
- Rheumy Spice
- Contradictory Spice
- Emotionally-Unavailable Spice
October 9th, 2007
- semi-boneless
- smooth jazz
- lucky sweatpants
- MySpace friend
- Microsoft fanboy
October 9th, 2007
- Dingell
- Boehner
- Sanchez
- Frank
- Craig
August 28th, 2007
- “When You Sleep” by My Bloody Valentine
- “Outdoor Miner” by Wire
- “Your Wedding” by Smog
- “Brand New Love” by Sebadoh
- “Make Out Club” by Unrest
June 26th, 2007
- “Cellars Remorse” - home radon test
- “Squeak’n Cleen”- industrial degreasing agent
- OEM pre-need funeral plan
- “Ridi Pagliaccio” - pepper spray replacement cartridges
- “Kozy Komb Krabby Kitt” - economy-priced pubic louse removal pack
June 26th, 2007
- World’s Greatest Lover
- Topic Expert
- Vatican Watcher
- Thought Leader
- Poet
June 21st, 2007
- open a modest home ass business
- serve hot meals of ass to the less fortunate
- hold a weekend “Ass Sale” on your lawn
- make colorful ass gift bags for the holidays
- give sympathetic testimony for recovering hump drunks
June 21st, 2007
- chimps
- The Godfather, Part II
- lobster rolls
- nature shows involving predatory insects
- Glengarry Glen Ross
June 12th, 2007
- heavily gelled comb-back
- omnipresent Bluetooth earpiece
- Radio Margaritaville
- the nickel tip
- frequent use of words “impactful” and “‘bro”
June 12th, 2007
- Thoracic Surgery With the Stars
- Track, Destroy, and Consume Your New Mom
- Mormon Idol
- Survivor: Leaky Hot Air Balloon
- Gastroenterologist 911
June 12th, 2007
- “The Gates: An Essay in 5,200 Consecutive Photos”
- “My New Zune ‘Unboxing’”
- “Rhinoplasty Recovery, Day 5: Still All Purple”
- “Back Moles Resembling Notable Whigs”
- “Goatee Moods, Fall ‘04″
June 12th, 2007
- the Leslie guitar effect
- the whole step key change on the last chorus
- the gong finale
- the “portamento” keyboard
- the vocoder introduction
May 29th, 2007
- sabre-toothed tiger
- Captain Crunch
- John the Baptist
- dwarf panda
- Casey Kasem
May 29th, 2007
- “Feeling That Way” by Journey
- “Kashmir” by Led Zeppelin
- “You Spin Me Round” by Dead or Alive
- “Leave Me Alone” by New Order
- “Caravan” by Van Morrison
May 29th, 2007
- Kraft Catalina salad dressing
- Sprite
- Concord Grape jam
- Eggo toaster waffles
- Stove-top Stuffing (Chicken flavor)
May 29th, 2007
- Performance
- Excellence
- Mission Statement
- Synergy
- Enterprise
April 5th, 2007
- “Stunning”
- “You are a very beautiful young lady”
- “Please move to MY town! LOL!”
- “I love the color of your eyes”
- “Do you have a sister? Just kidding. Ha ha ha. ;-)”
April 5th, 2007
- your sideboard
- your clergyman
- your thoughts on transubstantiation
- your hypothalamus
- your ranch dressing mix