Five terrible fake LiveJournal memes

  1. If you had to go through my trash and pick one discarded item to represent how you felt about my butt, what would it be?
  2. If I were a piece of food caught in your teeth, would you pick me out? What kind of food would I be? Would I be delicious even after I’d been trapped between your molars since lunch?
  3. If the two of us were naked in a phone booth and we both had to fart really bad, how would we bring it up? Who would fart first, and would it smell like flowers?
  4. If I were a tumor, where would I be on your body? How long would it be before I metastasized to your liver?
  5. Please post the compliment you think I would most enjoy hearing about myself. Now, do this every morning.
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