Archive for January, 2004
Tuesday, January 27th, 2004
- crunk
- nizzle
- Linux
- gi-normous
- craptacular
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 27th, 2004
- Professor Buggery, Ph.D. Can your child’s teachers pass
our Pederasty Popquiz?
- That’s Not Chocolate! How would you know if there were
poo-poo in your family’s candy dish?
- Rats, Cats, & Big, Curly Pubic Hairs The filthy truth inside your favorite
“Four Star” restaurants
- public_humiliation@yourcomputer.com What career-ending
secrets are lurking on your family’s hard drive? Is The Government cataloging them
right now?
- "My Baby’s on Fire!" Find out if your child is
one of the hundreds at risk for Spontaneous Toddler Combustion
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 27th, 2004
- Mommy’s Atrocious Rash-Inducer
- Old Spinydrawers
- Rod Serling
- Short Circuit II
- Mr. Limpy
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 27th, 2004
- The kitty photos (especially that fourth set)
- That one post where you were really drunk in Devan’s room
- The time you ate that amazing pot pie but then got totally sick
- Your series of charcoal drawings of Jonathan Frakes as a sword-wielding furry
- That post where you promised to update more often
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 27th, 2004
- climbing the rope
- towel snapping
- chinups
- square-dancing week
- surreptitious penis comparisons
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 27th, 2004
- Queen - “We Will Rock You,” b/w “We are the Champions”
- Chic - “Le Freak”
- Wings - “Listen to What the Man Said”
- Bee Gees - “Too Much Heaven”
- Blondie - “Heart of Glass”
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 27th, 2004
- Preference for a given Olsen sister
- Brand of water cracker
- System for opening the mail
- Favorite magazine about NASCAR
- Best way to order at the taqueria
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 27th, 2004
- Wearing a monocle
- Developing and deploying a complex personal gang sign
- Angrily demanding that people call me “Colonel”
- Speaking exclusively in terrible cockney rhyming slang
- Constantly referring to “my novella”
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Thursday, January 15th, 2004
- Kihntankerous
- Kihnjoined Twins
- Kihn-Tiki
- Under Kihnstruction
- Kihntucky Rain
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Wednesday, January 14th, 2004
- Incentivize
- Deplane
- Impact
- Blog
- Party
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 13th, 2004
- Roach clip with feathers
- Coarsely grained, oddly hard, stuffed animal
- Lynyrd Skynyrd coke mirror
- Another throw
- Big-ass pink comb
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 13th, 2004
- Painters’ pants worn with ‘Mork’ rainbow suspenders and Dallas Cowboys 3/4-sleeve shirt (1979)
- Johnny Bench sneakers (1975)
- T-shirt airbrushed with the cover of “Wolverine #1″ comic book (1982)
- Hüsker Dü “Metal Circus” t-shirt (1987)
- Batman halloween costume (1972)
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 13th, 2004
- Metallica / Master of Puppets
- Sousa / Marches
- Beastie Boys / Paul’s Boutique
- Laibach / Life is Life
- Sonic Youth / Daydream Nation
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 13th, 2004
- Peter (throws an elaborate party and no one comes; he stands alone, stiffly, wearing a weird double-breasted suit)
- Greg (screws around reading hot rod magazines when he should be working; loses his Dad’s drawings)
- Mike (freaks when Natalie Schafer’s guest-starring character wants a factory shaped like a powder puff regardless of how practical it is to build)
- Cousin Oliver (jinxes the entire family after awkwardly turning up as a tired plot rejuvenator)
- Davy Jones (clearly not sure why he’s there or what he’s expected to be doing; smiles broadly and plays along anyway wearing inexplicable striped pants)
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 13th, 2004
- Teenage Fanclub / Everything Flows (1990)
- Pylon / Crazy (1986)
- The Fall / Victoria (1988)
- Drivin’ and Cryin’ / Scarred But Smarter (1987)
- The Sugarcubes / Birthday (1988)
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Sunday, January 11th, 2004
- Japanese businessmen are considering a leveraged buyout of the Sunset District
- Little Laotian man around the corner is secretly a rich, hostile pimp
- Someone’s about to receive a giant, novelty-sized check from Ed McMahon
- The 85-year-old man next door is about to get a Queer Eye makeover
- I’m actually Bon Jovi
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Sunday, January 11th, 2004
- David Soul - Don’t Give up on Us, Baby
- The Village People - Macho Man
- John Travolta - Let Her In
- Alan O’Day - Undercover Angel
- Meco - Star Wars/Cantina Theme
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Friday, January 9th, 2004
- Papa’s Li’l Cry for Help
- Thar’s Gold in Them Thar Prostates
- Your Mom’s Not Coming Home IV
- Better’n a Hairweave, Matey
- The Boss’s Obsequious Little Bitch
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Friday, January 9th, 2004
- Faddish, i.e. punk hair-styles
- Halter tops and/or bare midriff costumes
- Public Display of Affection (PDA)
- Shoving, skylarking, and other horseplay
- Articles of clothing advertising alcohol, drugs or tobacco
Posted in five things | No Comments »
Friday, January 9th, 2004
- Thompson Twins’ Into the Gap album cover (entire back)
- Map of Bayonet Point, FL (face, shaved head)
- Cartoon Calvin peeing joyfully on the staff of Pitchfork (upper
left arm)
- “TALK” & “ROCK” (knuckles of either hand)
- Hash mark for each time I’ve seen Cheap Trick (back of neck; currently 5)
Posted in five things | No Comments »